My name is Ella. I’m 24 years old lady, and this is my story.
My mother is a widow with two children, I have an older brother who is married and lives with his family in the Northern part of Nigeria. My mother has been responsible for our upbringing since the demise of my father with the assistance of my uncle from when I was a toddler until I completed my secondary education. After I finished my WAEC and JAMB, my uncle who resides in Lagos requested that I come over and spend holidays with him and his family pending when my results will be released. My mother felt it would help me to explore another city since I was always helping her sell her wares while refusing to go out with my peers. After I arrived at my uncle’s house, I had lots of opportunities to relax, watch movies and to visit the mall to window shop since my uncle and his wife had thriving business which kept them busy. My uncle gave me pocket money to buy whatever I needed whenever I went out, and since my uncle’s children were all grown and married to their spouses, he did not have any financial responsibilities towards them.
I observed our neighbor living in the next apartment was relatively close to my uncle and his wife. Whenever he visits the house, he would invite me to pay him a visit which I turned down, but he always insisted so I promised to do so when I was less busy. On one such occasions, I went to his apartment, and he seemed nice, and we chatted as if I had known him for a long time, and he escorted me back to my uncle’s apartment. After the first visit it did not seem strange any longer when he came around, although I did not feel comfortable visiting a guy’s apartment alone.
On my second visit, he came around and noticed that I was home alone, he asked to know why, and I told him that my uncle and his wife had an emergency call home, and they came home to inform me, and they will be back by the weekend. He asked me to come around to watch a movie with him, I refused, he persisted, and we went to his apartment that evening. He insisted that he would prepare a meal, he did and served drinks to which I told him, I do not take alcohol, he maintained that it was low alcohol and would not affect me, after taking it, I lost consciousness of my myself, I was drowsy as he lifted and placed me on his long sofa, removed my clothes, inserted his penis into my vagina and raped me. When I woke up, I was feeling weak with pain in my vagina. He had gone to work and locked me in with a note that there was food in the fridge, and I should rest till he returned from work.
He came back from work in the evening, apologizing while asking for my forgiveness. I requested my phone, but he would not give it to me nor allow me to go to my uncle’s house. He forced me to shower and eat the food he brought back from work, and I did. He insisted I join his movie night, I refused, he became forceful, and I was fearful for my life, that he may harm me, so I did, and he repeated the same, he raped me two more times before morning, I was exhausted and tired. Immediately, he was done with the incident, he began pleading for forgiveness as usual saying it was the devil and I was too exhausted to say anything. I was experiencing pain, anger and sadness while praying for my uncle to return earlier.
It seemed my prayers were answered because my uncle and his wife cut their trip shot because according to them, my phone was switched off and whenever they called the perpetrator, he will tell them I was fine and when they asked him to take the phone home to me, he will tell them he was not at home. My uncle and his wife arrived and met my absence, he asked his wife to report at the nearest police station while he came to look for me at the perpetrator’s apartment. He knocked the door and unfortunately for the perpetrator, he opened the door, thinking it was the dispatch who came with the food he ordered, my uncle pushed the door open and found me in sorry state, he held him tightly while controlling himself not to hit him. Fortunately, my aunt arrived just in time with the police, and he was handed over to the police while we all went to the station.
The police referred us to WARIF Centre. At the CENTRE, I received medical assessment, treatment and psycho-social counselling for free. The staff at WARIF Centre are very professional and dedicated in the discharge of their duties. I accessed psychosocial counselling for free and this helped to begin my healing journey from trauma. My counselling sessions with the counsellor at WARIF Centre have been very helpful and helped me to heal. I was taught coping mechanisms to help deal with my emotions and I can confidently say am in a safe space of hope, healing and peace. I also joined the Group therapy session where I developed a sense of belonging and it helped to build up my self-esteem. The perpetrator was charged to court and convicted for crimes committed against me. It’s been a few years now I do not feel like ending my life again because I see the light at the end of my ordeal.
I am in my final year at university. I have healed emotionally and psychologically, and I look forward to becoming an advocate for the sexually violated in society.
Thank you to the Management and staff of WARIF Centre for restoring hope and confidence in me and other survivors.
-End-
* Real name of survivor changed for confidentiality
Dear survivor, please know that you are not alone, and it is not your fault. Help is available. If you have been raped or know someone who has, please visit us at:
The WARIF Centre
6, Turton Street, off Thorburn Avenue, Sabo, Yaba.
or call our 24-hour confidential helpline on
0800-9210-0009
For questions or more information please contact: [email protected]
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